yesterday some of us in the branch went to the spastic association for children to be volunteers for a children's day carnival held there.. quite an experience for me i must say, this being my first time volunteering at a special needs school.

each of us was in charge of a child.. and our roles included bringing the child all over the carnival to play all the games, take care of their needs like feeding, cleaning them etc..

i'd nv really known wat cerebral palsy is all about. din know it can be so seriously impairing. the kids were majority wheelchair bound, stuck at infantile mental age, unable to express themselves and are totally dependent on caregivers and volunteers to take care of their every need.

my girl was one of the most seriously impaired. honestly, i was a lil' jittery at first.. like how should i take care of her, wat if i do something wrong, how do i know how to handle her if she starts acting up etc? they all seem so fragile. i was alone with her, and u dunno wat can go wrong. luckily the teacher gave me some info about her.. like her ways of expressing dislikes and likes... and haha she disliked most of the games and refused to try.. anyway i was v afraid when at one point she started hitting her head furiously with her left hand... only till later did i realise that her left hand shld always be tucked under her shirt to ensure she doesn't hit herself.. and how she kept jerking her head around during feeding time and i thought she was throwing a tantrum and din want to eat.. but the teacher came and told me that's her way of showing happiness. and at one point she kinda choked on her food and i didn't know wat to do other than patting her back!

being a volunteer with these children is really draining, challenging, but at the same time, meaningful. it's really not just about learning how to wheel them around, getting comfortable with their saliva getting all over u, breaking their food into small pieces and dipping them into water to make it more soluble for them, or even dealing with their different ways of expressing themselves and understanding their needs..

to me, i feel it's about really wanting the best for them even when they do not understand ur intentions and are unresponsive. it's about giving and not wanting anything in return. i always feel that anyone can feel ur sincerity and love, no matter who it is. even the mentally challenged. just give lots of patience and care, with a non-judgemental attitude, they can feel it. they may not be able to show their appreciation, but that's not wat voluntary work is about anyway.