i'm employed!

i've decided to blog since
i) i'm waiting for my hair to dry then go sentosa with a babe.
2) it's a public holiday eve and i'm finally home at this time, feeling a little free for once.
3) i dun wanna be such a bad blogger.
4) i've started work for the third week n can't wait to talk bout it.

and so.. after 2 weeks of slogging and with a signature on some paper last thurs, fi is officially an associate psychologist!

yay! it feels good to be employed, and not bumming around. i've cleared my medical examination, cept that doc says i'm underweight. sheesh.

anyway, so far the job's been good. been going down to primary schools, assessing kids n stuff, and it's really meaningful n fulfilling to be working with kids for so much of the time. pretty much what i enjoy and want to do.

only tough thing is all the travelling here and there.. it's really tiring to be going to different schools each day, a couple per day. each morning i have to get up at 6am, 6 plus if i'm lucky, and find my way to a new school by bus or mrt. brrr.. talk bout our claiming system. we can't claim transport if we're gg from home, or gg home from schools! sheesh. and wat's more, this job requires me to carry my heavy test kits around.. so i gotta lug this heavy briefcase each day i do school visits, and it doesn't help that during morning n evening hours the buses n trains are always so packed... try balancing on high heels while carrying two heavy bags and nothing to hold on to, it's a struggle man. like today, i realise i have a blue black on my arm from carrying the blardy bag (not very good for after-work shopping). and guess wat, this is like the lightest test kit already, i'm told. there are psychologists in my branch who sometimes have to pull those big trolley bags with wheels around.. some tests weigh like 15kg!?!

but i love jobs whereby i can travel around so much.. everyone knows i hate those kinda jobs that require me to sit in the office all day. *shudders* i have a phobia of it from some internship 2 years back. the one last year was good cos i travelled quite a bit too.. and this one, bout half to 3/4 of the time i won't be in office. so yay! even though it's physically draining. heck.

anyway when i become an AP formally next mon, there's gonna be more things to come... lotsa stuff that we need to do on top of school visits and fieldwork... projects, workshops, reports, meetings (one whole day per week!), training.. blah blah blah... i'm really both excited and apprehensive. but like most psychologists, what we'd enjoy most would always be the fieldwork and the interaction with kids. the rest of the work, just comes with the job.. so.. bleh.

honestly there are certain things i dun like bout working in the ministry.. all the red tapes, rigidity, inflexibility etc. the very things that get at me. but i guess this is a very gd starting point for me to learn and experience things.. and wat's more, i'd really like to reach out to those kids with learning difficulties, and i can only do so in this setting. for now at least.

okie lastly to pen off... i think so far what i've experienced with the kids got me thinking bout certain things (like wat's new?). sometimes when i'm with them, i feel helpless. like, whoa, how can i help a kid like this? i'm only assessing u, what can i do to help u? i feel segregated from the process of helping. sometimes u hear bout their stories, sometimes u see the harsh reality against them. and there's always the neverending debate bout what's really good for them. should we diagnose, or not? diagnosing is a label, but yet it allows them access to help. and wat's more, how do we really know whether the kid is having learning deficits, and not due to environmental problems? how do we sieve out these differences?

i guess this field is really challenging in that we have to always be on the go, always thinking critically, always be updated on newest research and findings and available resources, always be ready to answer academically and professionally when asked on views and issues. plus the very tight schedules and visits on top of all the other work (basically no leave taking during term time). there's alot i need to catch up still... i'm really both excited and apprehensive at the same time. i wonder how it'll all go.. but i think at the end of the day, if i feel for wat i do, i shld just put in the best i can and go for it.

now i'm late to meet my babe.