just one of those weeks that's crazily busy and i feel like i.can't.breathe.

signed up to be a coach of a therapy for adhd kids. intervention has been something that i wanna try my hands on, so it's a great opportunity for me. and it's been fun! but the workload is crazy =( and what with all the major policy decisions and exco papers and meetings i've to go for concurrently, no joke.

yesterday i experienced firsthand how hierarchical my organization is. the perfect example of prata and her high and mighty ways.

was in one of those big meetings with external professionals at our workplace. my bosses and unfortunately, prata, were all present. we catered some light snacks and finger food, which were on big plates placed in the middle of the conference table.

so halfway through the meeting, prata (who was 2 seats away from me) suddenly signalled the small individual styrofoam plates to me, indicating me to fill up each plate with the finger food. so i thought ok, just fill up the plates and pass down to everyone. but to my dismay, she signalled me to serve each small plate to each of the external people at the meeting, complete with fork and spoon. so there i was, halfway through a serious discussion (and still trying to follow the points), holding small plates of food and walking round the huge conference table to serve each plate to each person, like a french maid! i was only missing a white apron and cap, seriously. maybe i should carry the pot of tea and go, "m'am, would you like some tea?"

now which one of you out there, gotta do this in your job?! is your workplace culture really so hierarchical, such that bosses and subordinates are so clearly delineated? over here, we do feel like it's terribly hierarchical, such that we can never feel close to our bosses, and in fact many of us feel like work machines rather than humans with our rights and feelings.

it's such an oppressive environment. you're always watching out for your bosses, being conscious of whether they are watching ur every move, because u just feel so much like their henchman, and u're so afraid of making a wrong step.

thankful i have colleagues to vent all these to, and to know that they fully understand.

feel totally stuffed and unhealthy right now... need to detox! been eating very rich food like everyday, every meal. had a good fat wagyu steak yesterday (thanks dear for cheering me up!), with fried mushrooms, then had a thai meal of shrimp paste rice, green curry, fried chicken wings for lunch with my sinful colleagues, and had my fav ippudo ramen for dinner again!

gawddd. ippudo ramen is how good, really. the soup is thick and rich, with a thin layer of oil, and with freshly crushed garlic added, i can't describe the richness of the soup. gosh!!

but i feel so sinful and feel such a need to detoxify!

going for some l4d with my l4d-virgin colleagues tmr evening.. looking forward to kill some zombies (and pretend they're prata).. hahah!